05 May The First Night
My fingers clutched at his dark, curly wisps of hair, my eyes closed in a hypnotic trance, my lips pursed together. I lay there, silently, with him mounted on top of me. Occasionally, I will myself to let out a seductive moan of encouragement.
Not that he needed any. He was in the throes of pleasure – riding me, grabbing me, pounding into me. His weight crushing my ribs, his mouth ravaging mine like a savage animal tearing through its prey. His smoky breath assaulted my nostrils, making it difficult to breathe. He bit into my right nipple as he pinched the other one making me writhe in pain. A single tear made its way out of one eye and rolled off my cheek. I led him into believing I was enjoying it. The sooner he climaxes the sooner this finishes, I thought!
He thrust back and forth, and continued to lunge, grunting and moaning as pleasure racked his body. Shortly after, I felt him go limp and then roll off of me. Gasping with pain and relief, I propped myself up searching for the clothes he had earlier ripped off of me and tossed aside. I lifted myself up and walked over to pick up my half-torn shirt.
Wiping my tears, I gathered my clothes and did my hair, pretending nothing had happened.
Casually, I picked up the money he had left for me on the bedside table and made a call to my agent.
dvaal
Posted at 16:50h, 05 MayPowerful picture you’ve created. Painful to read.
mandibelle16
Posted at 17:08h, 05 MayPowerful story and as a woman, I felt disturbed. I could relate to the beginning in someways. But your lines at the end are the twist. She is getting paid to have this done to her. Makes me sad, anywhere any other time we’d call it rape.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 17:10h, 05 MayExactly! I was so nervous posting this, Mandi. Am so glad it had the desired effect. Thank you so much. Means a lot.
Akaluv
Posted at 17:23h, 05 MayI liked your descriptions and the emotions here. It was really good. I’m looking forward to reading your other works.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 17:31h, 05 MayThank you so much. That’s so encouraging. Eagerly await your feedback on the previously published works. 😉 Headed your way now 🙂
Akaluv
Posted at 17:35h, 05 MayYou are very welcome! I’m currently in the process of writing two books, so I love reading stories.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 17:37h, 05 MayI’m reading that bit now. CoT looks interesting. All the best for your books. I’m in the middle of my first WIP. Have graduated from thinking about writing to actually writing. 😀
Akaluv
Posted at 17:46h, 05 MayThank you 🙂 I need to get back into writing. I’ve been plotting out my stories and now I have to actually write again lol COT is interesting if you want to read a merman romance 🙂 Thanks for checking out my blog.
Dr Meg Sorick
Posted at 17:37h, 05 MayOh my goodness, little sister! What a painful subject to adddress! Very well done. You painted a very clear, albeit heartbreaking picture of what was happening to your character. Great writing, difficult writing!
Wandering Soul
Posted at 17:45h, 05 MayThank you, elder sister. 🙂 So thrilled at that comment. 🙂
Dr Meg Sorick
Posted at 17:55h, 05 MayYou are welcome!
MindandLifeMatters
Posted at 20:26h, 05 MayPowerful description, the twist at the end was mind blowing! Kudos to you for writing this very difficult subject and writing it so well! 🙂
Wandering Soul
Posted at 03:40h, 06 MayThank you! For your help in making it better too . 🙂
MindandLifeMatters
Posted at 03:47h, 06 MayNahhhh, no thank you between sisters….! You are a good writer! 🙂
timelesswheel
Posted at 08:51h, 06 MayHeart-wrenching. You are a good story teller.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 07:11h, 07 MayThank you 🙂
sassandsauce
Posted at 11:01h, 06 MayThe title and the first line – I was anticipating a sexy erotic little snippet.
Next couple of lines – I thought it’s an abusive husband/ marital rape.
Nothing prepared me for the end.
Dude you killed it! I actually cringed, I felt so bad for the woman 🙁 Awesome piece of work..
Wandering Soul
Posted at 11:04h, 06 MayYIPPEEEEEE!!!!!!!! Thank you, Ms. Sassy. Appreciate the detailed feedback. That’s exactly the effect I wanted. So thrilled it came across exactly like that. Thank you! Thank you!
sassandsauce
Posted at 11:05h, 06 MayNow you better write something happy to cheer me up!
Wandering Soul
Posted at 11:07h, 06 May😀 Soon, I Promise 🙂
Sonali Mukherjee
Posted at 14:34h, 06 MayThe picture was so vivid and heartbreaking. My heart goes out to the poor woman who is violated just for the scraps of fancy paper that seem to run our world.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 14:40h, 06 MayThank you, Sonali! I’m glad it had the desired effect. That’s really encouraging, especially coming from an amazing story teller as you 🙂
Clueless Birdie
Posted at 17:40h, 06 MayIt is so discriptive , I can imagine each word . Powerful but sad. Very well written Piyusha 😀
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Posted at 17:43h, 06 May[…] on my novel and had been cut off from my blog except for a few random posts. But yesterday, wrote this post as an attempt to go beyond what I as a writer am comfortable with. Took me a great deal of courage […]
Ruchi Singh (@RuchiWriter)
Posted at 06:34h, 07 MayBeautifully written. Invoked the right emotions – grief and pity
Wandering Soul
Posted at 07:08h, 07 MayThank you so much. Also, for commenting and for visiting, Ruchi!
stuartaken
Posted at 07:08h, 07 MayCleverly constructed to arouse empathy and produce shock for the reader. This is good writing. Keep at it; talent like this should be nurtured.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 07:10h, 07 MayThank you so much, Sir! Really appreciate your visit and feedback. 🙂
xaranahara
Posted at 18:41h, 14 MayAgreed. She writes better than most Americans, that’s for sure.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 18:46h, 14 Mayhahaha! Thank you, that’s a big big BIG compliment for an Indian!
devikafernando
Posted at 07:40h, 07 MayMy goodness, that was intense. You’ve done a great job with this. The use of a lot of descriptive words, visual as well as audial, is good. Made me feel her misery and think it’s real.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 07:57h, 07 MayThank you, Devika 🙂 Your comment made my day. 🙂
Anand
Posted at 07:45h, 09 MayYou paint powerful pictures with your words, Piyusha. It was a moving story.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 08:56h, 09 MayThank you, Anand! 🙂
xaranahara
Posted at 18:40h, 14 MayTime for that woman to get a different job. Great story, great twist, and great insight into reality. That man would not want to fuck me. I would get him right back. I would teach his ass a few things.
Wandering Soul
Posted at 18:48h, 14 MayPity she didn’t have you teaching her a few things. 😀 Thanks so much! 🙂 🙂